Broken Record (love on repeat)

You named me again,*
as with my mum,
my health flickered;
light a new name and
a child will flourish.

Like the shadow of a dreaming carp,*
I float to the kitchen;
it’s breakfast in Hong Kong.
eight hours to an evening feast;
here, at two am, I nibble cheese and hummus.

When my aunt visits you, she
invites you to eat delicious buns, and
just for a moment, your eyes open;
far away in another hospital bed,
I am not fixed, but I know what the pieces do.

This January, you forgot which
epic drama episode you’d seen,
asked your eldest to play “Oblivion” on repeat;
when I was five, you sent you voice on tape,
telling a story of an elephant and an ant.

Today, more than three decades later, I record:
“Hello Grandma, it’s me – the name you gave me,
I really hope you get well soon!
Here are fifteen kisses; xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx..”;*
with extra – in case one gets lost in the post.






There was/is a Chinese tradition that if a child suffers from health issues, the parents rename and give them a luckier name.

Recently made a fish for a performance. It’s now in the living room hanging out with the religious icons. Carp is a lucky Chinese symbol.

Idea for performing the xx in the piece:

  •  Rather than making kiss / mwah noises for the kisses, make small / visibly sized square-ish pieces of paper with kisses (e.g in red/ multicoloured crayon).
  • Or make the squares or stars (or hearts – maybe that’s a bit cheesy) from multicoloured paper.
  • Drop them on the stage in a rhythmical manner
  • In silence.
  • Or while striking a glass tumbler or mug with a teaspoon like a message sound.


Probably grammatically incorrect but looks like a sideways emoticon of a playful look, with speech marks for my hair, blowing a kiss.

About The Mollusc Dimension

"Like existence, art, expression and even the urge to explore are in a state of flux, revelation and memory. Each encounter through the doorway, into the state of creativity is a catalyst for action, emotional and spiritual as well as physical and intellectual. As Krishnamurti says, there is no state of happiness but the state of the creative moment." This is currently the "Writing Dept" (eg “just words” — well mainly!) for The Mollusc Dimension, AKA Angelus Squid Marr, an East-Asian, British, experimental, interdisciplinary artist working in music, image and sound. He has a particular interest in themes of identity, queerness, intersectional feminism, surrealism + education and using lo-fi/ everyday materials (words/experiences/equipment) in addition to technology.
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